A life seen – a future found
This year’s Learning Disability Week theme, “Do you see me?”, asks an important question about how we recognise people as individuals – their strengths, their ambitions and what matters most to them. There is no better illustration of this than Mark’s story…
Mark Totman is 43, an avid Arsenal fan and part of a close, caring family alongside his sister, Claire, and his dad. Staying active, connected and engaged has always been important to Mark and his family, and together they had already built a strong foundation of meaningful activity.
Mark attended ECL Colchester (Woodlands) one day a week, where he enjoyed a wide range of activities and had built friendships. Outside of this, he was a regular at Colchester’s Gateway Social Club and had even volunteered at Barnardo’s. Thanks to his family’s support, Mark had a rich and active social life.
Mark’s enthusiasm for sport and physical activity really stood out to the team at ECL Colchester. While he continued to enjoy his time at Woodlands, they recognised an opportunity to build further on this passion through greater access to community-based activities. To support this, they referred him to ECL’s Community Connecting team, whose focus is on helping people expand on their interests in their local community and build meaningful, lasting connections.
A shared interest and a new opportunity
When Community Connector Ian first met Mark in September 2023, they quickly found common ground in their shared love of football – even if they didn’t agree on which team was best!
At the time, Mark was living with his dad, following the loss of his mum. As his dad approached his 70s and recovered from a recent fall, it was becoming more difficult for him to support Mark to access the activities he enjoyed, particularly sports and exercise.
Recognising Mark’s interests, Ian suggested Sport for Confidence at Leisure World – a programme offering a range of multi-sport activities, supported by Occupational Therapists. Mark was keen to give it a try, and Ian supported him to put in a referral, knowing that demand for the service meant there would be a wait.
In April 2024, Mark’s referral was approved. Although Ian offered support to get started, Mark felt confident attending with his dad’s help. The sessions were an immediate success.
Mark’s enjoyment quickly grew into something more. He encouraged his girlfriend, who he had met at Gateway, to join him and they now attend together each week, strengthening both his social connections and his confidence.
Sport for Confidence is really good. I go once a week on a Wednesday. I’ve got friends like Reece there, and I play football, tennis, table tennis, but basketball is my favourite.
Mark Totman, ECL Community Connecting customer.
Seeing the bigger picture
While supporting Mark to access Sport for Confidence, Ian also spent time getting to know his family. Through conversations with Mark, his dad and Claire, it became clear that there were growing concerns about the sustainability of Mark’s living arrangement.
His dad was finding it increasingly difficult to meet Mark’s needs, and this was beginning to place strain on their relationship – something that had previously been very strong.
Drawing on his background as an adult social care social worker, Ian recognised the early signs of family pressure. Rather than focusing solely on Mark’s immediate need for physical activity, he took a more holistic view, considering what would support Mark and his family in the long term.
In April 2024, Ian gently introduced the family to the idea of planning ahead. This included exploring options such as additional Personal Assistant support or, potentially, supported living.
As Ian explained:
“It was a good time to start planning. It meant we could look at what would work best for the whole family, rather than waiting until things reached crisis point and decisions had to be made quickly.”
Supporting the journey, every step of the way
The family agreed to request a review with Adult Social Care, which Ian initiated on their behalf. Knowing that waiting times for non-urgent reviews can be lengthy, Ian continued to support Claire throughout the process, helping her to follow up and ensure the referral progressed.
When the review took place in January 2025, the family felt prepared and informed. Ian attended the initial meeting to support them in sharing their situation clearly and to advocate for both Mark’s needs and wider family circumstances.
It was agreed that supported living options should be explored. From that point, Ian stepped back slightly, leaving the family in the hands of the social worker, whilst remaining available for guidance and regular check-ins.
After visiting several options, one stood out immediately – not least because Mark discovered that his friend Mo, from Gateway, was already living there.
The choice was an easy one.
A positive and lasting outcome
Mark moved into supported living in August 2025, and the impact has been significant.
He now leads a full and active life, supported by his new team. His days include community activities such as discos and trips to Clacton, alongside continuing with Sport for Confidence. He is also building greater independence, taking part in everyday tasks such as shopping and household routines.
A key part of his happiness has been the friendship he shares with Mo. The two have become inseparable, enjoying day-to-day life together.
Just as importantly, Mark’s relationship with his dad has been restored. Living nearby, he visits regularly, but now their time together is focused on enjoyment rather than care needs. They have rediscovered their bond, spending quality time together as father and son.
With the help of his supported living team, Mark also stays connected in between visits using a tablet his family bought for him – often catching up about upcoming football fixtures.
It was the best decision ever. Mark is flourishing and living his own life, like any other person. We can visit regularly and enjoy his company as his family rather than as carers.
Claire Chaplin, Mark's sister.
A life that works for everyone
The change has been transformative for the whole family.
Mark is more independent, confident and socially connected. His living arrangement is stable and sustainable, no longer reliant on family carers.
As Claire reflected:
"Without Ian’s wisdom and guidance, we’d probably still be in the same, if not much worse position than we were when we met him. We are so grateful.”
This is a perfect example of this year’s Learning Disability Awareness Week theme – “Do you see me?” By taking the time to look beyond the immediate need and focusing on the bigger picture, Ian helped Mark and his family achieve a positive, lasting outcome – one that supports not just today, but the future too.